While scrolling through Pinterest this week I came across this quote and I can't stop thinking about it...
"If someone wants to be a part
of your life, they'll be there.
So don't bother saving a spot
for someone who won't make
an effort to stay."
The quote is by Michael Cera. I googled him because I had no idea who he is! He is a Canadian actor and writer and guitarist. The part I identify with him on is the fact that he is a middle child, like myself, and that he must have had the same experience and same pain in his heart as I do to have said this quote.
We've all heard the comments and funny remarks about social media and technology and that our friends are all at the push of a button instead of face to face. I am all for the connections we can make through social media and understand it more and more because of my two Etsy shops and Pinterest and Twitter and Stumble Upon. I too sometimes "talk" more with my friends through Facebook or email than in person these days.
I still need the personal connections though. That face to face, one on one is how you tell who is a true friend. I treasure my friends and those in my family that are my friends. I am working on not saving a spot for those that won't make the effort to stay.
I have a high standard (maybe too high!) when it comes to friendship. I want a give and take. An equal sharing of time, trust, confidences, advice, prayer and love as opposed to a dumper and a dumpee. I am all for you venting to me if I can vent to you! I want to know where I stand with you as a friend. I can list those friends that I know that I know are there for me, love me and have no ill will towards me. Then there are those I am not so sure of. Some of them are in my family. Those are the ones, if any, I may tend to save a spot for, just in case they come around. Just in case they realize what they are missing in having me as a friend. Just in case they want to start making an effort to stay.
Scripture has got it all there for us -
Proverbs 17:17 says "A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity" (NIV) meaning when you are in trouble, you see who your friends are and how helpful a brother can be. Thank God for my sisters in Christ!
Proverbs 27:6 says " Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful." (NIV) meaning that a loyal friend may correct you and the wounds will heal, while a deceitful enemy says sweet things that offer no real help.
Whether you have friendships through social media or face to face....you know who your true friends are. They are a part of your life and want to be. Treasure them.
AnnMarie :)
Lovely post! I love the quote, so true!
ReplyDeleteI love this post AnnMarie. The quote will also stay with me - I also am a middle child and am not sure of the connection but interesting nonetheless. God has blessed me with true friends, very few but truly lovely. Other than that, it has been a balancing act between seeing myself as I think others see me (family tends to keep us in a box) and seeing myself and others the way God sees them, perfect in Christ, able to grow and change. To be expectant and open to hear Him in others He has placed in my life is an attitude I try to maintain. And it is such a joy when I hear His unmistakeable voice in them although it still does not necessarily mean they will be filling my 'spot', at least in the here and now.
ReplyDeleteWell spoken, AnnMarie! And having that common bond of Christ makes friendship so much sweeter!
ReplyDeleteThere is someone at my church who I have had over, watched a child once. She always insist we get together for lunch, but then ask me to call her. When I have called her in the past she talks constantly about herself, and I just listen. She stopped suggesting lunch for a long time, but she is at it again. I think if she was a friend she would take the time to call me sometime.
ReplyDeleteThis really helps as I have a sister that I try so hard to maintain a relationship with,,,,with no interest on her part...Thank you for sharing: ) If she wanted to be there she would: )
ReplyDeleteThis is something I needed to hear! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteIt can be easy to stop talking (face to face) with friends who don't make the same effort. But we do need companionship, so making the extra effort is important :)
Thanks for sharing. May we always be mindful of the other person in a relationship -- and remember that it's not all about us.
ReplyDeleteThank God for my sisters in Christ!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing.
♥♥♥
Sue
Ann Marie,
ReplyDeleteThis was GREAT!! Thank you for sharing from your heart . . .I too have family memebers and friends who don't seem to go the extra mile that I do but I have to remind myself that it's not all about me. I needed to hear this today:)
A lovely thought.
ReplyDeleteMy collection of friends come in all sorts and sizes and levels of intimacy and closeness. I love that variety. Father is so smitten with variety that He gave us each a different set of fingerprints and does not make two snowflakes the same. I definitely do not have a "matched set".
ReplyDeleteI practice having no illusions and very low expectations with them as well. It's when the opposite is true that many hurts and offenses occur.